If ever you feel stupid, remember that one time my twin brother forgot my birthday.
the bible said adam AND eve so i slept with them both
Well it’s the Bible, not the Straightble, I’m just following the book.
I’M GONNA CRY
i scrolled for an explanation and there was none
Crowley has read the books
Crowley writes the fanfics.
when you recognize a word from another language you’ve just begun to learn and ur like hEYHeY HEY WAIT I KNOW THAT MEANS and it’s probably some thing insignificant like ‘today’ or ‘maybe’ buT YOURE SO PROUD STILL LIKE HELL YEAH
'that's really a competition?' Love, Satan
i always sleep in a sports bra and shorts bcs then if my parents ever catch me in our kitchen at night i can pretend its because im leaving to go for a run and not bcs im secretly trying to eat large quantities of cake at 4 in the morning
What kinda motherfucking genie are u
a very unhealthy one
that’s the smartest fucking thing i ever heard